TMRW Woon

Maybe I should write sth from myself here... But I really don't feel letters under my fingers. I cannot. 

Life seems so normal, maybe a little bit grey, but starting to change from now. I found a place in Cracow finally, next week big room-decorating shopping, first night spent there.

Subconsciously I feel anxiety, but I try hard to keep myself going reasonably, without bouts of aggression and hysteria. Nothing beautiful is going to happen now, just go ahead, go ahead, go ahead. Next day, next week, next everyday-life test.

Dear "my favourite bloggers" - do you lie to yourself? Do you pretend for yourself that your days are magic, full of music and wine? Do you act in your life like in a good play? Does your youth tell you how to do it? Or maybe you find all this beauty and charm just around you? Mybe I live in a sad, boring and dumb place. Maybe I'm sad, boring and dumb, not to see life as you see it?

What is next? I'll see. I still believe everything is going on for some reason. But I don't believe that life is now beautiful and charming. And that it will be so soon.

Internet is beautiful. Tumblr is beautiful. Blogs are beautiful. Photos are beautiful. Thoughts are charming. Art is wonderful. Poetry is beautiful.

Life-is-not. 

Pretending is beautiful. Acting is beautiful. Lying is beautiful. Make-up is beautiful. Dressing up well is beautiful. Doing yourself for a girl from a film is beautiful. Shopping is beautiful. Trying to look like people from art sites is beautiful. Going through the streets feeling like a star  is beautiful. Being more interesting and intrigueing that you really are - is beautiful. Looking romantic and trying to dream - is beautiful.

Life-is-not.